More Wits of Spurgeon
Spurgeon shows with his ready humor that it’s possible for the highest spirituality to be exemplified in the brightest and cheeriest character. Well, I hope none of you is tired of hearing me talk about Spurgeon, ’cause I’d really like to share with you again more funny poignant things I read of Spurgeon… 
On Marriage
The earliest marriage service conducted by Mr. Spurgeon that was recorded was that of Pastor T. W. Medhurst and his first wife, Miss M. A. Cranfield. Mr. Spurgeon announced, at the commencement of the proceedings, that he was not going to perform the ceremony as if he were reading the burial service, nor as if he were about to thrust his two young friends into prison, and make their feet fast in the socks. He also said that he hoped their wedded life would not be like the Church of England marriage service, which begins with “Dearly-beloved” and ends with “amazement.” (ha ha ha ha! 
) He trusted that they would both be “dearly-beloved” not only at the beginning of their united career, but all through the end, and then for ever and ever; and that, while their sorrows would be mutually shared, their joys would all be multiplied. In expounding Ephesians 5:23, the Pastor, addressing the bride, said:
“According to the teaching of the apostle, ‘The husband is the head of the wife.’ Don’t you try to be the head; but you be the neck, then you can turn the head whichever way you like.”
Ha ha ha As a lady myself, let me say a hearty ”Amen” to that.
At another marriage service, many years afterwards, Mr. Spurgeon, commenting on the same passage, said to the bridegroom, another of “our own men”:
My dear friend, don’t you begin to feel proud because Paul says that the husband is the head of the wife. Solomon says that ‘a virtuous woman is a crown to her husband;’ and the crown is the top of the head. Still, the governing faculty should rest with the head; and the family will never be ordered aright unless we each keep our proper place.
On Infant Baptism
Dr. John Campbell was once in a second-hand bookseller’s shop with Mr. Spurgeon, and, pointing to Thorn on Infant Baptism, he said, “There is ‘a thorn in the flesh’ for you.” Mr. Spurgeon at once replied, “Finish the quotation, my brother,—’the messenger of Satan to buffet me.’”
Witticism
A lady in Worcestershire, writing to Mrs. Spurgeon concerning a service at Dunnington, near Evesham, says: “Mr. Spurgeon shook hands with seventy members of one family, named Bomford, who had gone to hear him. One of our deacons, a Mr. Alway, was at the same time introduced to him; and, in his own inimitable and ready way, he exclaimed, ‘Rejoice in the Lord, Alway!’”
At one of the meetings when contributions for the new Tabernacle were brought in, the names of Knight and Duke were read out from the list of subscribers, whereupon Mr. Spurgeon said, “Really, we are in grand company with a knight and a duke!” Presently, “Mr. King, five shillings,” was reported, when the Pastor exclaimed, “Why, the king has actually given his crown! What a liberal monarch!” Directly afterwards, it was announced that Mr. Pig had contributed a guinea. “That,” said Mr. Spurgeon,” is a guinea-pig.”
